Magic Hour

We recently had a company called Magic Hour provide a free photo shoot for our family. They do this work pro bono for people with cancer, and we are so grateful. The photographer who worked with us, Melissa of Icarian Photography, was wonderful. She made us feel instantly at ease. I have been in the mind of legacy lately, and what could be left for my daughter and husband, and so it was such a relief and gift to have this offered.

Here are a few shots:

Rauhala-Herskovich-34

I like to read. A lot. On days when fatigue wears me down, I rest here. Sometimes I close my eyes and the same soft breeze that brushes the Golden Gate wafts through those curtains. I remember the outside world, and I remember the long wide ocean that moves not far from me.

Rauhala-Herskovich-18

Our messy garden. The cherry tomatoes have gone bonkers. The colors and bees and flowers cheer me up. Sometimes the best living is not organized. In disarray you might find your heart.

 

Rauhala-Herskovich-40

And here, with my daughter, is mine.

Love out.

 

I Remember.

Flowers on the windowsill. Such pleasure in their colors and blooms.

IMG_8679

 

Yesterday a haze of exhaustion. Wandering. Up and down stairs.

Water.

My mind a sluice with this thought, that. No order.

Post-infusion low counts and a ton called not going on my belly. Aka: sit down. Aka: not today.

Taxotere. Cold slide into my veins and killing the quick cells. Do your work.

How the sun, beautiful wanderer, lights up all the kitchen jars and vases like a song through glass. I can almost hear it.

 

IMG_8680

Oh, warmth. Oh, living.

And arrival.  Here now.

What else was it that I wanted? What else did I ever ask for?